Home away from Home

Today for the first time I did not miss India. We have been in USA for about 2 years now and it has become a part of routine to miss home. But today, after visiting the Janmashtami Celebartions at Hindu Temple of Livermore, I felt like in India. I won't say that I was surprised seeing a large gathering there but I was truly overwhelmed. We had to wait 2 hrs in line for darshan and another 45 mins for prasadam. But every second was so peaceful. Faith and devotion of everyone there was heartwarming. People sitting on the floor to listen to the Bhajans. Children enjoying the devotional music. Cultural dance. Long queues. It was nothing I never saw before. But I had never imagined this kind of atmosphere in America. We have lived near Chicago for a year, and city has some of the biggest and most lavish temples in USA but I never got to attend any function or celebration there. This was my first time and was a great experience. I am looking forward to more such occasions.

Vande Mataram!!

On the eve of Independence Celebration I can't help but miss my "student" days. I never missed any 15th Aug in school and in college. Unlike school, it was not mandatory in college but that din't kill my spirit. And luckily I had some friends who were like me and kept my spirits high in college too. (Thanks Preeti, Rashmi, Sneha and Divya. Miss you guys more than ever.) After my college ended, next year, I went to my cousin's school to attend the function.

I have always loved the patriotic songs playing in the ground (sound from loudspeaker is only pleasant on this one occasion). I loved the performances - songs, skits, speeches and cultural dances. Though I never participated in one. Or may be once, if my memory serves good. And for some reason I never ate the the sweets that were distributed after the function. I used to take 'em home and give to my sis or parents.

After coming from school/college I used to watch the re-telecast of the function in Delhi. Babaji (my grandpa) and me used to celebrate 15th Aug and 26th Jan like all other festivals. He used to wait for us to come from school with "tri-color" and then we would perform a lil ceremony at home. (Miss you so much Babaji). Papa would bring sweets from office. Ruchi was never that enthusiastic but she always took part in what I did. (Though she was among the ones, reluctant to attend the school function).

Now that its been 4 years since my student life ended and 3 years since my last Independence Day function, and I have been out of country ever since on all my 15th Aug, I miss everything. I wish to attend these functions once again. re-join the spirit.

HAVE A VERY HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!!

"RESPECT THE FREEDOM"

Freedom consists not in doing what we like, but in having right to do what we ought. - Pope John Paul II

Ye Hausla - DOR

Yeh Hosla Kaise Juke,

Yeh Aarzoo Kaise Ruke

Manzil Muskil To Kya,

Bundla Sahil To Kya,

Tanha Ye Dil To Kya

Ho Hooo

Raah Pe Kante Bikhre Agar,

Uspe To Phir Bhi Chalna Hi Hai,

Saam Chhupale Suraj Magar,

Raat Ko Ek Din Dhalana Hi Hai,

Rut Ye Tal Jayegi,

Himmat Rang Layegi,

Subha Phir Aayegi

Hoooo

Yeh Hosla Kaise Juke,

Yeh Aarzoo Kaise Ruke

Hogi Hame To Rehmat Ada,

Dhup Kategi Saaye Tale,

Apni Khuda Se Hai Ye Dua,

Manzil Lagale Humko Gale

Zurrat So Baar Rahe,

Uncha Ikraar Rahe,

Zinda Har Pyar Rahe

Hoooo

Yeh Hosla Kaise Juke,

Yeh Aarzoo Kaise Ruke

Real Dream!!

I haven't felt more lethargic and weak(physically) in ages. It was the worst Saturday in months. I am not sick but I feel sick. I am not sad but I feel sad. And that one dream, I had two days ago is still so fresh in mind that it is making me gloomy.

Day before yesterday, I had this dream. I was crying. (I guess, its because its been so long since I cried in real). I was crying for some reason I don't feel appropriate to mention here. And then one of my friends called someone to console me. And when that person arrived, I woke up. And I don't remember feeling any dream more real than this one. I woke up with sinking heart. I wasn't crying but I was depressed. Choked. Lump in throat. Butterflies in stomach. And that mood hasn't quite left me.

Do these dreams mean anything??

A Special Friend

Today on Friendship day, I would like to dedicate this post to a girl who was very close to me until her untimely demise, 5 years ago. The loss left a hole in me and after all these years I still can't believe she's gone. This might sound strange, but every year around her birthdate (Dec 6th) I dream of her very often. Its like she is trying to tell me that she's still with me. There for me.

Epitome of simplicity and modesty. She had this child like innocence but at the same time she was real mature. She understood me so well that sometimes I felt like she knew me more than I did myself. We were in same class in school for 6 years. She was my bench-mate for 2 years. But our friendship grew stronger only after finishing school. She inspired me and encouraged me and she was one of the reasons I got admission in engineering. Honest hard worker and very determined. She had this aura around, a charm that anyone would be fascinated and attracted towards her. She was the most polite person I ever met. Compassionate and kind. Always there for friend.

She used to give me two cards for birthday. One on my official (on paper bithday) and one on my actual one. Two cards for friendship day, always with roses. Two cards on Valentine's Day, with roses. I never understood and never asked the reason for "two"?. And the words she wrote in those cards were so touching and genuine that I couldn't help but feel special, having a friend like her.

More than a friend, she was like a part of me. On dull days, I used to sit with her, hold her hands and talk. Pour my heart out and she always listened to me with great patience. She knew how to make her surroundings cheerful. She was a quiet kind of girl, but that never fading smile of hers always brightened everything. I wish I could have had more time with her.

I miss you, TINA.

Rest in Peace. God Bless!!